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Meeting The Family

The holidays are can be a reminder for many things, childhood, traditions, events. However, when you're an adult and single, it can also be a reminder to bring a date to Thanksgiving dinner. For others who are already in an on going relationship, the holidays also plays a part in testing each other if they can survive meeting the parents. Many people believe that one's family makes or breaks the continuance of a relationship. If meeting his friend weren't scary enough now you have to face making a good impression with his entire family, who generally are the people who matter most to him.

The first thing to remember is the obvious. Be yourself, but not the you that you act around with your friends. They do want you to be casual and relaxed they can sense BS very easily so don't play them for fools. Warm up to them know what lines you can and cannot cross. Don't try to impress them with gifts and avoid spending hours picking the perfect outfit or practicing in the mirror of what to say when meeting the alpha dog of the house, his mother.

The first time I met a boyfriend's family the "adult" way meaning you actually were able to post pone that serious step when it was the right time than when you were younger and they had to meet you right away I was extremely nervous. I had no idea that I was going to be meeting them at all. His family were all together to watch the wedding video of his recently married cousin and wanted to check out the footage. He gave me an option to deny meeting them, but I knew eventually if I wanted to be in his life it had to happen eventually. It's hard enough meeting one or two strangers, but a room full of sisters cousins, uncles, and all of their children felt like I had swallowed a bucket of rocks. I was terrified.

When you're in a room full of people, and you don't  know anyone it's not easy for everyone to just pick up a conversation all the time, but always be open when given the opportunity. I made sure every chance I got I asked questions and gave feedback during an open conversation. We all later played a game of Wii tennis to break the ice a little which helped. I knew I couldn't be shy at this point so I did my best to open up to everyone as well as letting my guard down a little.  

To some guys, meeting the family is a huge deal. Some don't introduce their girlfriends to their family at all unless they want her to be apart of their life for a long time. Keep in mind that you're dating him not his family but that doesn't mean you can avoid them forever. Some older sisters will be protective and some mothers will be a little judgmental for they want their son to be with THE best. Don't conform to what you think is their idea of the perfect "daughter in law" or girlfriend. Show respect, be yourself, and remember each visit gets a little easier where they may start to feel like your family too.


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