When Your feelings go from "We're just friends" to "I miss what we had"
You've been spending a lot of time with your ex and are enjoying the time you spend together that's when it happens; those feelings you used to have start coming back, all of sudden you're nervous when you're around them, you think a simple text saying "What are you up to?" hides more between the lines, and like word vomit, you find excuses to go down memory lane. So what do you do?
Backtrack : First think about why you two broke up in the first place. If it was for reasons of infidelity then getting back together probably shouldn't be an option. If the relationship ended for reasons of it being bad timing, first ask yourself if enough time has past yet to start over
Focus: Now that your ex has invested about 75% of time in your mind, try not to make him your main priority. Do your best to keep busy and focus on yourself in between the time you get to spend with him. No guy likes a girl who is always available, when he see's you have a life, he will want to find time to be apart of it. Also, keep things the same before you realized you wanted him back, just focus on getting to know him. Even if you think you do, there might be things you never got to find out when you two were into each other.
Evaluate: Now that you're motivated to give this another try, make sure he is showing interest. That doesn't mean drive yourself crazy analyzing everything he does while you two are together, it just means to take yourself away from the equation for a bit, and look to see if he is acting like a guy who just wants to be your friend or a guy who really likes you, but is too shy to make a move. Think of the little things he once did when you first started dating and see if he repeats those habits. Also keep in mind if a guy isn't interested, he won't offer to spend more time with you. Try to give him chances to ask you first to hang out again the more he makes a move the less you will feel like he is doing you a favor by saying yes.
Clarify: Now that you're at the point where it's time to say something. You want to express how you feel, but like any time you put your feelings on the line, you take the chance that you could get hurt. One of the hardest miss communications of men and women are we have a hard time reading each others signs. What may be obvious to a girl might be totally invisible to a guy. This is when you have to make the decision to go hard or go home. Either tell him exactly how you feel or stick to being secretly in love with them forever.
Accept: If he agrees with what you have say then your golden if not you can't really lose what you never had. But, if he still wants to spend time with you he may either not be interested but doesn't want to lose you as a friend or is interested, but still thinks you two need more time to get to know each other as friends. Like they old saying "Rome wasn't built in a day" so admire his mature decision that he values what you two have together.
Conclude: Whether things worked out or not still play it cool. Take your time and let things happen on it's own. Its only natural to want to fight for something especially when its something you really want. However, when it comes to dating fighting could make things worse before they even get better. You basically have to set a jet eye mind trick on him and let him come up with the idea that you two should be together. To do this, just make it appear that you don't need to be around him all of the time. That way he will find ways to convince you that you really do. ;)
You've been spending a lot of time with your ex and are enjoying the time you spend together that's when it happens; those feelings you used to have start coming back, all of sudden you're nervous when you're around them, you think a simple text saying "What are you up to?" hides more between the lines, and like word vomit, you find excuses to go down memory lane. So what do you do? Backtrack : First think about why you two broke up in the first place. If it was for reasons of infidelity then getting back together probably shouldn't be an option. If the relationship ended for reasons of it being bad timing, first ask yourself if enough time has past yet to start over
Focus: Now that your ex has invested about 75% of time in your mind, try not to make him your main priority. Do your best to keep busy and focus on yourself in between the time you get to spend with him. No guy likes a girl who is always available, when he see's you have a life, he will want to find time to be apart of it. Also, keep things the same before you realized you wanted him back, just focus on getting to know him. Even if you think you do, there might be things you never got to find out when you two were into each other.
Evaluate: Now that you're motivated to give this another try, make sure he is showing interest. That doesn't mean drive yourself crazy analyzing everything he does while you two are together, it just means to take yourself away from the equation for a bit, and look to see if he is acting like a guy who just wants to be your friend or a guy who really likes you, but is too shy to make a move. Think of the little things he once did when you first started dating and see if he repeats those habits. Also keep in mind if a guy isn't interested, he won't offer to spend more time with you. Try to give him chances to ask you first to hang out again the more he makes a move the less you will feel like he is doing you a favor by saying yes.
Clarify: Now that you're at the point where it's time to say something. You want to express how you feel, but like any time you put your feelings on the line, you take the chance that you could get hurt. One of the hardest miss communications of men and women are we have a hard time reading each others signs. What may be obvious to a girl might be totally invisible to a guy. This is when you have to make the decision to go hard or go home. Either tell him exactly how you feel or stick to being secretly in love with them forever.
Accept: If he agrees with what you have say then your golden if not you can't really lose what you never had. But, if he still wants to spend time with you he may either not be interested but doesn't want to lose you as a friend or is interested, but still thinks you two need more time to get to know each other as friends. Like they old saying "Rome wasn't built in a day" so admire his mature decision that he values what you two have together.
Conclude: Whether things worked out or not still play it cool. Take your time and let things happen on it's own. Its only natural to want to fight for something especially when its something you really want. However, when it comes to dating fighting could make things worse before they even get better. You basically have to set a jet eye mind trick on him and let him come up with the idea that you two should be together. To do this, just make it appear that you don't need to be around him all of the time. That way he will find ways to convince you that you really do. ;)
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