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Everybody's Doing It

This blog is a little different from my normal blogs because it's more personal. There always comes that time in our life when we feel pressured to do something we're not ready to do, or don't want to do at all. Whether it's having sex, doing drugs, or drinking, there are going to be people in our lives that just don't understand our choice to say "NO!".

My recent birthday of 21 years of age brought a small frenzy of friends and associates that were eager to take me out to the local bar. When they asked what my new experience was like they soon became confused after finding out I have still yet to cross this so called "right of passage". "Why?" is a basic yet popular question I get frequently, along with the sound of annoyance in their voices when they hear that I am not quite ready yet.

For so long I was once respected for coming this far now that I am 21 I am ridiculed. But it wasn't like I didn't know this day was coming. When my birthday hit at midnight I wasn't happy at all. If anything I was hoping to skip 21 and go to straight to 22 , something a typical 21 year old would never be thinking at this moment. And at this moment all I could think of were the countless people excited to finally see me drink finally feel like I can socialize into their world.

I think to explain my decision is to go back to the source of where it all started. I was 18 and recently broke up with my boyfriend. My first boyfriend the one that kick started every blog worthy relationship I have had in the past 3 years. The first person to say I love you the first person to kiss me at age 17 and the first person I slept with. To some loosing your virginity at 18 would be considered an appropriate age that strays away from a promiscuous reputation. However, for me I wish I waited a tiny bit longer. Though I don't regret my decision however, like many firsts "Its wasn't the way I imagined it would be"

After going through this, I figured even though I’m far from being a statistic and to many I’m considered "rare" I still wanted that one accomplishment that I can be proud of. Since drinking was never a huge issue for me and I was barely around it I decided this would be the one thing I can control. That final crossing point in my life that I can actually do when it's the right time.

So, here I am 21 and miserable because I have come so far in my life and am so close to throwing it all away because society says I should get on with it already. The decision of when I drink is not up to the people around me. Having this accomplishment means something to me. I am not saying I never want to drink I am simply implying that when I drink it's because I want to not because I feel like I have to. I thought turning 21 would be stress free, but now that I have no "excuse" to say no all I deal with is pressure. Yes I would like to have a cocktail one night, yes I want to have champagne at my wedding. But I will not give in to the temptation and ruin what I have worked so hard for just t shut up my audience. The day will come, but right now all I feel is pressure around me, and until the focus is off me that day will finally come. On its own.

When people pressure you to do something you don't want to do, remember that this is about your life not there’s. Don't let them feel like they have a right to verify what you should be doing with it. The only way to get though this is to stand up for yourself and ignore the criticism. Most likely they aren’t going to like what you have to say, but keep in mind, you can say the same thing about their "brilliant" ideas.


  1. I'm so proud of you on being your own voice, and not allowing pressure to take hold of you !

    By the way as it was told to me...People will pressure, push, and try to influence you to do the wrong things ! Rather it's going out in traffic driving when your not ready, drinking, drugs, or having sex as you mentioned.

    But Lord forbid you are injured, sick, or can't function...They will look at you and say...Wow that's messed up and keep rolling !

    They are there for the pressure, but not the aftermath !


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